From The Scoop: Freakies

From the December 8 issue of Gemstone Publishing's The Scoop:

Remember Freakies Cereal? If you're a child of the '70s, we're guessing you do. But did you know that Jackie End, the Ralson Purina copywriter who created the colorful cereal mascots in 1971, based every personality on her coworkers at the company?

That's right. BossMoss, Hamhose, Gargle, Cowmumble, Grumble, Goodie-goodie and Snorkeldorf were all fellow Ralston Purina employees, presumably a good-natured bunch with tongue-in-cheek senses of humor.

Check out the original Freakies song, used in early campaigns for the cereal and take note, as the lyrics delineate the different personalities:

Oh we are the Freakies
We are the Freakies
And this is our Freakies Tree
And we never miss a meal
Cause we love our cereal
This is the Big Boss
We call him BossMoss
Make sure you spell it right
Snorkeldorf they call me
So handsome and pretty
Here's little Hamhose
He's got a weird nose
Do I really have to sing?
My name is Grumble
I am Cowmumble
You're standing on my foot
Gargle is his name
Smartness is my game
I know more than you do
And don't forget me
I'm Goody-Goody
I always do what's right
For instance, I eat Freakies
cause it's got a lot of vitamins
and it's good for me
Oh we are the Freakies
We are the Freakies
And this is our Freakies Tree
Yessir...

When Jackie End created the characters, it's likely she had no idea just how popular they would become--or that they would outlive the product they endorsed by decades. By 1974, the cereal and the characters were being marketed nationwide and the first of several Freakies fan clubs were cropping up, led by people from all different walks of life. From first-graders to frats and sorors, fans helped make the Freakies premium manufacturers millionaires in less than three years on the market! The t-shirts advertised on the sides of boxes were constantly on backorder, and with End writing new and exciting Freakies stories to accompany the premiums, the popularity of the characters grew by leaps and bounds.

Though today, the cereal itself can't be found anywhere in the U.S., the Freakies are still considered to be a very viable part of ad campaign history. The original 60-second commercial was displayed at The Museum of Modern Art (MoMA) for years!

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